DONE

“Done like dinner.” Is an expression we use to say "It's done". Meaning "it’s over, finished, and there’s no more to do".  After a nice big dinner I sometimes say, “I'm fed up,” as a compliment to the cook communicating that I'm full.  I ate a lot. It was good. The tongue in cheek, or sarcasm is a way of teasing, bringing levity to the situation. But let’s look at the word “done” and see when it feels good and when it doesn't. 
 
Many of us know what it’s like to be at the end of our rope and walk away saying, “I'm so done!” In this context we feel like we have done all we can, our patience has worn thin, or we just can’t get the outcome we want.  If you've ever driven by a half painted house or fence, you know that someone was so done that they quit.  My imagination runs through the reasons, or excuses.  Ran of paint.  Didn't like the color.  Had an emergency that pulled them away. Got a sunburn from painting in the sun in shorts and tank top with no hat, shade, or sun screen,  speaking from experience. 
 
By doing this I give what I’m seeing a benefit of doubt and I’m full of mercy and forgiveness.  Looking back on my own “so done” situations, I’m still justifying why I threw in the towel and quit. I may have gone back and tried again with a new perspective, better tools, or in the case of the house paint followed the shade around the house.  I may have apologized or had a serious discussion of the event to make peace so things could get done properly. On schedule.  Maybe with a few compromises.
 
And that’s the done that is the good one.  There’s something about stepping back, and looking at a project, or attending a grand opening for a client’s project and knowing it’s done.  Life has a way of helping us to know when things really are done and we have to step away.  If you or I are perfectionists and obsess too much the joy and creativity is taken away.  My daughter hates the words, “good enough”.   But as she gets older and projects pile up, she has decided that something can be done even if it isn't perfect. 
 
In the Bengali language they have a saying that when translated means, “A blind eyed uncle is better than no uncle at all.” And that’s become a saying my husband and I use from time to time when something needs fixing before being replaced completely.  Is it a blind uncle? Yes. But it’s also done!
 
The Christ on the cross let us know when He was done with being the perfect sacrifice for our sins. It was like putting enough money in a bank to meet the need of every person until the end of time. That includes us today in our generation.  His last words were, “It is finished.”  What He came to do was done.  It appeared the greatest failure and end to a very great man. But like when our life’s done, it will just be the beginning.
 
Speaking of done, my new book is called, “Done-With-Dementia” because of what we did to keep our parents together. When they died we, and they, were really done with dementia. (link)     

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